Christmas 2006
Christmas had started early this year.
Eff had rushed in towards the end of November, flourishing a piece of paper in her hand, and waving it energetically in the direction of the garden, where Ron was fighting a losing battle with his large hedge, had cried out "Ron, come quickly and have a look, I've solved our problems for at least this year! No unexpected visitors, no Marquis, no Dutch, no French, no family - just Donald, Mickey and Minnie and Pluto, and a few others!"
"What the hell is she going on about" wondered Ron, who had had many experiences of Effs "arranging" things in his life, and had learnt to become a little bit sceptical.
Pushing aside the hedge where he had hoped to stay undiscovered for about a month (until just after the Noel festivities, at least) he stuck his head out, narrowly avoiding the pet family fox, who had come out of his lair, to chase the pet miniature pig, belonging to the neighbour, which spent all it's existence in Ron & Eff's back garden.
"My God", thought Ron, "things are getting off to a great start!"
Avoiding the various little packets of natural fox and pig manure, he wended his way back to the house, to be immediately assaulted by Eff!
With her hands around his neck, she whispered in his ear "Sugar, I've got it!"
Now this disturbed our Ron, because he didn't fancy catching whatever it was she had, and anyway, he didn't know where she had got it from! He took a couple of steps backwards, and said "No Eff, our last Saturday bath night was so long ago that it can't possibly be showing consequences now!"
"Oh you are so silly, my treasure" gurgled Eff into her man's ear, "I mean that I've won it!"
"Oh my lord," thought Ron"how much has, or is, this going to cost me?"
Being the stoic type, and with years of experience, he said nothing, and waited for the inevitable pouring out of the news.
"Well," stuttered Eff in her excitemen, "you remember I told you that Sainsbury's were organizing a Christmas lottery, free, with the main prize a trip for two for the Christmas period, to Disneyland?"
"Very vaguely" said Ron, "but you're always filling in bits of paper, while I do the shopping!"
"Good bloody job I did," retorted Eff," I've won it!!"
END OF PREFACE ---- Part I later!
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