In the series "Europeans" - "The Scotsman..."
from the series: Europeans
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The above photo shows a few things about the Scotsman.
The National sport is, of course, Golf - a sport invented by bored Highland shepherds, who hit lumps of sheep excrement from one point to another with their crooks, little suspecting that not even a Century later, all the other Nations would be paying dizzy sums of money to do almost the same thing!
As the photo shows, the Scotsman is a naturally outgoing person, doesn't like hiding things, and another of his favourite pastimes is being chased by predominantly English policemen.
It's the bain of a Scotsman's life - being often accused of "stinginess". In fact, it is, more often than not, simply the lack of funds, because he has already given more than he should have - to others.
He is accused of many things, having a staple diat of Porridge, and a form of "Oats" that the English (for example) would not want to get - made from water and salt, and not (as in the English version) of milk and sugar...!
He is also accused of wearing a skirt, but nobody would dare to suggest this as an "effeminate" factor.
They are accused of wearing little or nothing underneath this skirt, but this is a mixture of legend, and the fact - once again - that no money was available for English-style bloomers!
In fact, the practice of wearing, or not wearing, is highly dependant on individual endowments, and lucky is the Scotsman who wears something underneath, for the National emblem - a Thistle - is not the thing to tangle with if you have nothing on - underneath.
Another well known plant in Scotland (almost the National plant) - the Heather - is also a "prickly" subject!
The Scotsman is accused, unjustly, of making noises!
It's not he, himself, it's the one and only instrument he has (made from home grown things) that makes the noise and produces laments. Strangely enough, this instrument and the noise it produces, are much searched for - worldwide.
The Scotsman also has a very pronounced sense of justice and fair-play, much more so than that of the English, who claim to be the instigators.
He has understood, a long time ago, that if you don't let others win, they don't want to play with you anymore, so - when a Scotsman looks at the International Rugby league, he is generally charmed to see that his team has justified their presence and their motto of allowing others to celebrate.
Something which is never missing in Scotland are wooden spoons, and just as well too - they are needed to make and eat the porridge.
In short, everything the Scots have or ever have invented, has been "acquired" by others, from Golf to Whisky (with no "e") from Kilts to Bagpipes.
The Scotsman's National Heritage holds many, many wonderful things, from Porridge to Rabbie Burns, to whom a whole Night is dedicated, more often than not English visitors are in the majority.
Odes to a "wee timid cowerin' beastie" (the mouse) or another Ode "To a Haggis", are read and thunderously applauded by these invited Sassenachs, whose participation cheques have already been converted to a more readily usable currency.
The Scotsman, finally, is obviously an open, honest, World citizen, and with such delicacies as Porridge, Haggis, Whisky, Salmon,lobster and even Oysters, he is an obvious "Gourmet-connaisseur" with a large slice of travel and learning requirement in his veins.
He (the Scotsman) has no racist thoughts, and is therefore ideally placed to travel the World - often in very high society - and very Diplomatically solves highly important World problems.
It is murmured that on top of the some 8 million or so Scotspeople living actually in Scotland, there are around 3 times more scattered around the World.
To go so far as the English, and say that for a Scotsman the best road is "that which leads to England" is not only untrue, but stupid.
On the other hand, the English, I am sure, would be the first to admit and rejoice over their good fortune in having so many "Scots/Jocks/Scotties" at the height of their Society!
BUT ---- That always has been the case and will no doubt remain so!
If YOU have a Scotsman as a friend, treat him well and kindly - you will be repayed in kind...!
**************
©iwmpop Mars 2009.Vauvert, France
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Europe-"The Scotsman"
The above photo shows a few things about the Scotsman.
The National sport is, of course, Golf - a sport invented by bored Highland shepherds, who hit lumps of sheep excrement from one point to another with their crooks, little suspecting that not even a Century later, all the other Nations would be paying dizzy sums of money to do almost the same thing!
As the photo shows, the Scotsman is a naturally outgoing person, doesn't like hiding things, and another of his favourite pastimes is being chased by predominantly English policemen.
It's the bain of a Scotsman's life - being often accused of "stinginess". In fact, it is, more often than not, simply the lack of funds, because he has already given more than he should have - to others.
He is accused of many things, having a staple diat of Porridge, and a form of "Oats" that the English (for example) would not want to get - made from water and salt, and not (as in the English version) of milk and sugar...!
He is also accused of wearing a skirt, but nobody would dare to suggest this as an "effeminate" factor.
They are accused of wearing little or nothing underneath this skirt, but this is a mixture of legend, and the fact - once again - that no money was available for English-style bloomers!
In fact, the practice of wearing, or not wearing, is highly dependant on individual endowments, and lucky is the Scotsman who wears something underneath, for the National emblem - a Thistle - is not the thing to tangle with if you have nothing on - underneath.
Another well known plant in Scotland (almost the National plant) - the Heather - is also a "prickly" subject!
The Scotsman is accused, unjustly, of making noises!
It's not he, himself, it's the one and only instrument he has (made from home grown things) that makes the noise and produces laments. Strangely enough, this instrument and the noise it produces, are much searched for - worldwide.
The Scotsman also has a very pronounced sense of justice and fair-play, much more so than that of the English, who claim to be the instigators.
He has understood, a long time ago, that if you don't let others win, they don't want to play with you anymore, so - when a Scotsman looks at the International Rugby league, he is generally charmed to see that his team has justified their presence and their motto of allowing others to celebrate.
Something which is never missing in Scotland are wooden spoons, and just as well too - they are needed to make and eat the porridge.
In short, everything the Scots have or ever have invented, has been "acquired" by others, from Golf to Whisky (with no "e") from Kilts to Bagpipes.
The Scotsman's National Heritage holds many, many wonderful things, from Porridge to Rabbie Burns, to whom a whole Night is dedicated, more often than not English visitors are in the majority.
Odes to a "wee timid cowerin' beastie" (the mouse) or another Ode "To a Haggis", are read and thunderously applauded by these invited Sassenachs, whose participation cheques have already been converted to a more readily usable currency.
The Scotsman, finally, is obviously an open, honest, World citizen, and with such delicacies as Porridge, Haggis, Whisky, Salmon,lobster and even Oysters, he is an obvious "Gourmet-connaisseur" with a large slice of travel and learning requirement in his veins.
It is murmured that on top of the some 8 million or so Scotspeople living actually in Scotland, there are around 3 times more scattered around the World.
To go so far as the English, and say that for a Scotsman the best road is "that which leads to England" is not only untrue, but stupid.
On the other hand, the English, I am sure, would be the first to admit and rejoice over their good fortune in having so many "Scots/Jocks/Scotties" at the height of their Society!
BUT ---- That always has been the case and will no doubt remain so!
If YOU have a Scotsman as a friend, treat him well and kindly - you will be repayed in kind...!
**************
©iwmpop Mars 2009.Vauvert, France
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