Different kind of emergency......!

Oh boy, what would I have given for a button like this in my bedroom, just a couple of hours ago!
First I'll set the scene......I'm still bedridden - still taking the tablets and hoping that very soon, either tomorrow or the day after I'll be able finally to get up and move around the appartment at least....SO - I'm in bed!
Tina Concetta, my only link with anything alive, has had to go shopping, and it looks like there has been a problem - she has been gone 3 hours - just to the local shop, in the car.
I have to somehow or other get to the telephone which is, rather stupidly, sitting in the living room, looking at me, and almost like  it's saying "dumb-dumb"......!
It's only about 10 feet away, but it might as well be 10 miles, my chances of making it before I black out are very slim. Maybe I can try to slide on my holier than holies, at least the floor is tiled and not wooden with splinters!
Even if I make it, I have no idea what I should call! Probably the local police, bunch of comedians, but the only ones "sometimes" available! There are no neighbours, I guess I could call Philippe, but he may well be at work and anyway is miles away. Maybe he has an idea of who to call..........
One thing is certain- in future, my mobile charges permanently in the room I'm obliged to pass m time in, and will normally ALWAYS be on my body. Jeez - We went to the expensive of getting this particular one because it has a so-called emergency button, and big touches, for useless beggers like myself!and it's not even in the same room as me!
Well, eventually I made a start - sliding down to the bottom of the bed, I managed to get my trousers - after all, I'd need to cover up the family jewels. if I made it standing up, even more so if I passed out!
Maybe, I thought, this is a nasty way of forcing me to get out of bed! Maybe it would work - the radical cure.......Now - if I lived in USA, I would at least have a   defender, there are thousands of 'em within calling distance I understand - nice, huh?
Anyway, the decision was taken out of my hands - my head just started turning round......spinning more than turning, but somehow I insisted - for aboy 2 minutes - which was two minutes longer than the last time I tried! Maybe these new tablets are doing something (although I've only started yesteday and only taken 3 to date).......well - I "woke" up lying in the bed I had fallen back onto! I felt exhausted, nauseus and ready to give up, when - wonder of wonders - I heard the noises of a little lady coming home!
Immediately all thought of giving up disappeared - I'm a guy and responsable for her health and happiness.......well - thats a good one, the truth is of course, that we're like every other couple, both responsible for each other. It's just that disaster likes striking us, but that has to stop some day, so let's try to help us on the way and try to preview EVERYTHING, except winning the National Loto - besides millions of tax Euros..........?
This is one of the examples of Tina Concetta's immense values for me, and I know that I have some large values for her too. It's normal, it's natural - We're a couple, and we're gonna do our utmost to keep it that way!
Give up??........in plain English.......GO GET STUFFED!

*******************

YEAH,,,,
A confirmed and adjured European.

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