I love the end of the year! I can say to myself, "jeez, got another one out of the way" and be astounded that it is true!
I also love those little things that are sent to completely "knacker" our plans for a peaceful Christmas! You know, those "utility" bills, planned to fall on our doorstep on the 15th December each year, demanding payment by the 17th December, or "WE'LL CUT YOU OFF".
Oh dear, give me the chance to meet the people concerned, together with my surgical scissors, and I'LL cut something off!
What I love, each year, are the little, useless messages sent with the bill. You know, the water company, who tells you that you have consumed twice as much as last year, although you've showered only half of that which you did last year, but they have a couple of tips for you (you've still got to pay immediately, mind you!).
For example, your water may be expensive, but don't forget that 50% of your town's piping is out of date, and is liable to allow lead (Ph) to get into your glass of water! Solution is, according to the water company, to let your water run for 10 minutes, to get a glass of clean stuff!
Imagine, they are allowed to deliver you with poison, and charge you for it!! I say - go and suck a pencil, it's less dangerous!
The water company sends me another little happy memo, telling me where my water comes from, and the various values in the analysis. It tells me, for example, that (I quote): "The presence of pesticides in excessive concentrations does NOT necessitate any restriction in the use of the water"
Does it surprise you to know that mr le marquis tends to use and gets himself poisoned from the plastic!
Another one I like is the Electricity company, who delight in informing me, in the height of the cold season (or what is considered as such here) that my consomation has been higher than last year as well! They carry on to tell me that if I put myself into another category, and if I promise to consume more, they will charge me less! When I say "OK, guys, let's go!" they tell me (every year) that my cable setup in the apartment is not capable of accepting a higher, cheaper voltage/wattage, and I must firstly change ALL the wiring! It so happens they have a list of 1st class electricians they work regularly with, would I like their address?
I scratch my head, and dig out the petrol heater for those 2-3 days of real cold!
Personally I feel that these companies could have participated to our "Christmas Joy" by sending us all a Christmas card, instead of these useless little memos! They could have added to my Christmas "spirit" by giving me back 50% as a Christmas bonus!
I'll have to wait until next year for that!
weather at Vauvert, France
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